the day without u, my beloved papa..

can u just imagine someday u will lost ur dad?? what would u react?? can u still stay strong?? or u r going to act tat u r alright?? ever since i was young, i never dare to think of it.. and yet, it really happened in my reality life... i just do not wan to accept tat my dad has gone to another world whereby not belong to us.. i've lost my dad.. i can't accept the fact tat my dad has gone.... he leaved without saying a goodbye, take care and 'my dearest, pa loves u.'.. all this time, keep on asking myself a lot of questions... i don't know whether am i a good girl to my dad... did i make my dad proud of me?? etc.... u will never know the feeling, seriously.... keep finding ppl to accompany me, but seems everyone is busy... staying in the room can just make me think the memories with my dad.... i dun know to say im ok to everyone who has asked am i alright?? seriously, im not ok at all.... i'm not as tough as u guys think... im just an ordinary girl... my heart is very painful... my heart drops when i think of my dad.... i dun wan him to leave me so soon and so sudden.... i haven graduated yet... u haven see ur girl graduate yet, pa... pa, u haven celebrate my 21st birthday.. we haven treat u well yet.... a click of eyes, can happen lot of things and changed everything... u cant predict wat will happen to someone who is far apart of u.... just appreciate every single hour, minute and second with ur love one....  seeing u laying in the coffin motionless really broke my heart... calling ur name and u din answer me.... it was totally cruel... the 10th day without u.... dun worry my father... i love u and no one can take away ur status in my heart.... bye...